Idea for the Greatest Computer Mouse ever (kindof a joke but I would totally buy it if it existed!)

So I had a stupid Idea for the best Mouse ever, so here is the Features I would like that thing to have. This is for Right handed Mice, for Left handed Mice just mirror the Idea. :wink:

First of all its a Mouse, so it needs to be able to do Mouse Buttons. I am thinking of a Logitech G502 kinda design but with two more buttons right from the Rightclick (to mirror the two ones left from the Leftclick). Then add that 12 Button Panel of the Corsair Scimitar to it. In general itā€™s a Gamer Grade Mouse with RGB and stuff.

Two Mousewheels, next to each other, the left one for Vertical and the right one for Horizontal Scrolling by default.

Ofcourse the thing has Macros, why else would there be that many Buttons, so the thing has to register as a Keyboard to whatever itā€™s connected to in order to provide that functionality.

Since Mouse and Keyboard Functionality are not combine-able with regular ancient PS2 ports, as far as I know, the thing has to be USB ofcourse. But why stop at USB 2.0, lets go full Thunderbolt 3 with a detachable 2 meter Thunderbolt Cable on this sucker!
In case you did not know, Thunderbolt-3 and USB 3 C are using the same Connector and USB 3 C can work on Thunderbolt Controllers just fine (if it is not using Apples Driver Software). It should also be downwards compatible to USB 3 C and also only consume a maximum Power that USB 3 A can provide for compatibility with Adapters.
A low Power USB 2.0 Compatible Mode would also be great.

Now to Onboard Memory, the Mouse is gonna have RGB and Macro Profiles, so it needs to store them somewhere. And storing such things on the Computer is really stupid, if it can be done with Onboard Memory, similar to how the G502 has. Donā€™t use the Onboard Memory of the Corsair one because Corsair is way too stupid to handle Onboard Memory in any kind of logical sense.
But why just copy the onboard memory system of some proprietary manufacturer, why not just store Text Files USB Stick Style on the damn Mouse, that can be edited even with the antiquated Notepad.
ofcourse its nicer to have an interface to edit Stuff in, so that Onboard Memory also contains a copy of the Software used to Configure it in a more Userfriendly GUI way, preferably in an exe format and a Linux compatible format, maybe even runnable directly from the Mouse without needing to install it!
And if you decide you need to use more advanced features like executing programs whenever you press a certain Mouse Button, you can install the Software so that it runs in the background and does that stuff for you. Simple Macros are definitely not something that would require this Software to be running in Background.

So now how to split up that Onboard Storage:

  1. Partition = Read-Only: contains the Background Service Installer Software and the ā€œrunnable without requiring installā€ Editor Software (they are two different things ofcourse). Also contains an example Configuration that gets written to the second Partition whenever there is no Configuration File present.
  2. Partition = Read/Write: 512-1024MB should be more than enough, contains only the Configuration Files. Each Profile is one Configuration File, names dont matter, it will just parse all the Files in Alphabetical order. And again they are Clear Text Files, you can even edit those with Notepad if you seriously wish to.
  3. Partition = Drivers, Software Updates and other Backend Storage, so that it is possible to get Updates stored on the Mouse itself to apply when needed, while still keeping the original Version on the first Read-Only Partition.
  4. Partition = Read/Write/Bootable/SSD: I would say 64GB is mandatory at the very least, preferably more. This should make the Mouse usable as a bootable USB-Stick with an SSD Controller for high speed and wear leveling.

You know Yubikey USB-Sticks that Display Numbers used for 2 Factor Authentication? Yeah a small Screen on that Mouse at the place where the center of the Palm usually rests, so itā€™s mostly obscured by your Hand, but we have to work with limited space here and be glad that I wont let you pick up the Mouse and turn it around just to see that Code!

Speaking of turning this thing upside down! and SD-Card Reader and a Micro-SD-Card Reader on the Bottom of the Mouse, just because! Why two separate ones despite Micro-SD to SD Card Adapters existing? Well maybe you wanna use that Micro-SD Slot for additional Storage!

On the back-right side of the Mouse we place a USB 3 A Port, so you can jam a USB-Stick or so in there in case you need to access it, or just get one of those Intenso Slimline Sticks and perma add even more Storage! Reason for the placement to be back-right is because thatā€™s the place where the hand usually does not touch the Desk.
You know what? Usually Thunderbolt-3 Controllers have two Ports by default for Daisy Chaining Stuff, lets add a Thunderbolt Port right next to that USB-Port to use both Slots of it (one of them was for connecting the Mouse Cable to the Computer).

Wireless? Eh why not! Just add a Battery to that thing, that lasts like 1 hour or something, maybe more if you dont use too many peripherals. And a Wireless Receiver that is Thunderbolt-3, because you still have that Adapter for USB 3 A, that you obviously dont use for the Cable.

The Mouse itself could also act as a Wireless Receiver for WiFi and stuff, even if weak. Maybe even a 4G-LTE Receiver with a Sim Card Slot in the bottom of the Mouse next to the SD Cards, so you can connect to the Internet anywhere.

I will not add a Compartment to store that USB-Cable of the Mouse, nor for the Thunderbolt-3 to USB 3 A Adapter that comes with it. Instead we get a Box that is perfect to store the Mouse to go.

Now for the Ridiculous Parts that I wanted to keep separate:

Speakers and a Microphone built into this damn thing! Why not! The Macro Controller should be able to turn Volume up and down for each of those so you can assign Buttons on the Mouse for that if you need to.
And yes I imagine some typical consumer idiot who has no idea of Tech to just say ā€œhello? Computer?ā€ into the Mouse. XD

Hrrm, some people like Optical Mice, others like Laser Mice, why the fuck dont we just add a toggle for them to this thing! Also Macro Controllable ofcourse!

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Okay another Idea, why not add a downwards compatible Blu-Ray Burner to it! Sure it wont fit in the Mouse, but Mousepads could handle that part!

While we already talk about accessories, the Mousepad could also do Wireless Charging for the Mouse, as well as handling all the Thunderbolt-3 Stuff wirelessly!

Floppy Disks are such an antiquated thing, but people in Japan still use it and we ofcourse dont want to ignore the Market for that! So a compact Floppy Drive next to the Blu-Ray Burner inside the Mousepad!

The Mousepad should ofcourse have a combined Audio Jack IN/OUT Port on both the left and the right! Yes there is Audio Jacks that can handle Microphone and Stereo at the same time without needing 2 cables! And if you really need to have separate Audio-IN/OUT, you can always just use an Adapter Cable for that, I have one of those, and money clearly isnā€™t a factor for this Luxurious thingamabob!

The Mousepad should ofcourse serve as a USB 3 A and Thunderbolt-3 Hub. The goal of this whole Setup is that you can plug everything through the Mousepad into just one Port of your Computer, including the Monitor, and Thunderbolt-3 can ofcourse handle that too.

Now having a huge Hub on that Mousepad might consume a lot of power, so lets add a Qualcomm Quick Charge Port to the thing and also a separate Power Input you can plug into your Wall. That way you can just plug your Phones and your Pads into this thing at all times for recharging!

Adding 2 Ethernet Ports to this thing is also a good Idea, so you can plug in your Internet at the Mousepad, because obviously your Computer has nothing but a Dual-Thunderbolt-3 Port to connect to, and one of the two is already used for Power Input. And yes such a Computer already exists! Why else would I talk about this abomination of awesomeness!

So here we go, the perfect Mousepad for the perfect Mouse!

The Ultimate Dongle!

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Oh I forgot one thing, two SSD SATA Slots for inside the Mousepads, or even better one SSD (2.5) and one HDD Slot (3.5)!

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Thatā€™s false! Floppy disks arenā€™t sold here anymore!
(from a resident of Japan :))

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I got that info from a comment of Gaijin Goomba, blame him and his study of Japanese Culture. XD

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